Jokes about lists

Mar 11, 2024 ... 5852 likes, 77 comments - coachsaysjokes on March 11,

Tick Tock Goes the Clock. Doctor: “Mr. Jones, you may want to sit down. I have some bad news and some very bad news… which would you like to hear first?”. Mr. Jones: “Oh jeez, I guess I’ll take the bad news first.”. Doctor: “The bad news” doctor notes, “is that I got your test results and you have 24 hours to live.”.Yo mama’s so fat, she jumped in the air and got stuck. Yo mama’s so fat, she needs GPS to find her own feet. Yo mama’s so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits next to everybody. Yo mama’s so fat, she needs a forklift to get out of bed. Yo mama’s so fat, her shadow weighs fifty pounds.Funny Toilet Jokes. My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you’re sleeping, send me your dreams. If you’re laughing, send me your smile. If you’re eating, send me a bite. If you’re drinking, send me a sip. If you’re crying, send me your tears. I love you!”.

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74 Funny Story Jokes That Earn Their Laughs. Linas Simonaitis and. Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė. 27. 1. ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner is well and fine if you need a quick joke to brighten up the mood. Yet, sometimes, the need arises for something longer, more along the lines of a funny story. But we all know how these situations tend to go—if ...Ian Crouch rounds up the funniest moments of 2021, with nods to “Ted Lasso,” Curtis Sliwa, Mark Zuckerberg’s metaverse, and more.166 list jokes and hilarious list puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about list that are clean and suitable for kids and friends. This article provides a comprehensive list of jokes organized in alphabetical order. Whether you are looking for a bucket list, honey do list, Christmas list, or grocery list joke, this article has it all!45 Hilarious List Puns - Punstoppable 🛑. My wife asked me to put ketchup in the shopping list. Now I can't read anything. 👍︎ 357. 💬︎. 18 comments. 👤︎ u/sm-aug. 📅︎ …Dec 2, 2021 · The four kids who make up the series’ wannabe gang are saving money to split for California. When one of them, Willie Jack (played, in a breakout performance, by Paulina Alexis), is asked by her ... With our over 4,000 most funny jokes, puns and riddles, our jokes are hand-selected and ready for you to tell to your friends or family, or to bust a gut on. Relationship Jokes. My boyfriend asked to play doctor. I kept him waiting outside the bedroom door for an hour. Losing a significant other can be hard. In some cases, it’s impossible. Kid: “I heard that in some parts of the world a man doesn’t know his wife until they get married.”. Dad: “That’s true everywhere, son.”.One Liner Ugly Jokes. You’re so ugly; when you walk into a haunted house, you come out with an application form. People say beauty is only skin deep. Thank goodness I’m ugly to the core! I’m so ugly, my reflection said, “Nope, not dealing with this today,” and walked away. I told my parents I wanted to be a model.A fish swam into a concrete wall, Dam! Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine. When life gives you melons, you might be dyslexic. The guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda was lucky it was a soft drink. The man who invented knock-knock jokes should get a no bell prize.Photo: Amazon. Funko Pop! Star Wars: The Mandalorian - The Child Vinyl Bobblehead. Star Wars Men's Rebel Classic Graphic T-Shirt. LEGO Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker Millennium Falcon 75257. Star Wars: Galactic Baking: The Official Cookbook of Sweet and Savory Treats From Tatooine, Hoth, and Beyond.Hurting you is the last thing I want to do… but it's still on the list. RELATED: 152 Funny Short Jokes That Guarantee a Laugh. Good Roasts That Rhyme. Leka Sergeeva/Shutterstock. Everybody knows that you're stupid… thought you could fall in love because you saw a fake Cupid.You don’t need to be asked–tell me a joke. Many dad jokes may be considered intentionally unfunny. An example dad joke might go, “I’m thirsty,” to which the dad will reply, “Hi, Thirsty, I’m Dad.” Dad Jokes. 1. What do call a mac ‘n’ cheese that gets all up in your face? …Too close for comfort food! 2.Want to make your friends cringe? From good jokes to corny puns, the best dad jokes offer endless fun and a boatload of groans.Dec 29, 2023 · Make a noise like a carrot. A driver and a zebra are out for a drive when they get pulled over by the police. The police officer looks in the car and says “You need to take that zebra to the zoo.”. So the driver turned around and took the zebra to the zoo right away. This joke may contain profanity. 🤔. I am over 18. One Christmas morning, a cop on horseback is sitting at a traffic light and next to him is a little girl on her brand-new bike. The cop says to the young girl, "Nice bike you got there sweetheart.Funny Toilet Jokes. My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you’re sleeping, send me your dreams. If you’re laughing, send me your smile. If you’re eating, send me a bite. If you’re drinking, send me a sip. If you’re crying, send me your tears. I love you!”.Dive into our compilation of the best Country Jokes that promise a chuckle from every corner of the world! Whether it’s the witty humor from Australia or the whimsical giggles from Brazil, we’ve gathered a diverse collection to tickle your funny bone. Curious about what makes a Kenyan lion roar with laughter or why a Swiss flag is amusing?A list of funny winter jokes! Winter truly is the most wonderful time of the year. A time when it’s perfectly acceptable to bundle up in a pea coat with a fifty-foot Doctor Who scarf and a mug of hot cider to get warm and push your way through the snow covered crowds to buy a gift for your sweetie. Anyway, these are the funniest winter jokes to …ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner, also known as a punchline in some cases, is a truly remarkable form of a joke. First of all, it is so short that by telling it, you’ll never … The best dirty jokes are not for the faint of heart and are guaranteed to make even the boldest blush. Our collection of 101 dirty jokes includes raunchy one-liners and hilarious punchlines. These jokes are perfect for adults who appreciate a more risqué sense of humor. Sit back, relax, and get ready to dive into the filthiest, funniest gags ... Nov 5, 2021 · 71. “Buffet” is a French word that means “get up and get it yourself.”. 72. Winter: the season when we try to keep the house as hot as it was in the summer, when we complained about the ... Jul 25, 2009 ... The lists of example cookies above should include all domains for which cookies are set, but may omit some 3rd party cookies, especially in ...

Nov 21, 2023 ... ... list celebrity guests, memorable comedy, and topical monologue jokes. GET MORE NBC Like NBC: http://Facebook.com/NBC Follow NBC: http ...Because I've found my direction with you.”. 68. “If you were a star, you'd be a supernova.”. 69. “You must be a dictionary because you add meaning to my life.”. 70. “You must be a planet because you have me orbiting around you.”. 71. “If I had a penny for every time you made me smile, I'd be a millionaire.”.Nov 1, 2023 · The Best Jokes About Friends. Friends are a blessing in your life. If your friends are true, you can always find them by your side, no matter how sad, happy, or challenging the situation is. And as you already know, jokes have the power to make you laugh. So, when friends and jokes are combined, there ought to be happiness and laughter all ... List of Jokes about Penguins . 1. Why don’t penguins like talking to strangers at parties? They find it hard to break the ice. 2. What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost. 3. Why did the penguin cross the road? To prove he wasn’t a chicken. 4. What do you call a group of penguins at the North Pole? Lost tourists. 5. Why don’t ...Obese po. A Filipino woman and her husband, an American, wake up the morning after their wedding and decide to take a shower together. In the middle of their fun, the water cuts out. The wife cries out, “Ay! Walang tubig!” (“Oh no! No water!” in Tagalog).

137 Jokes About Life. By Laughlore Team Updated on October 25, 2023. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to a delightful exploration of life’s whimsicality. Life is a …They say that laughter is the best medicine, so it’s a good idea to have a few jokes on hand whenever you need to cheer someone up. With cute, funny, short jokes, you can turn some...…

Reader Q&A - also see RECOMMENDED ARTICLES & FAQs. Oct 22, 2021 · One is a necromancer and the other is a neck roman. Possible cause: 4. The youth pastor walked toward us as we gathered in the church lot for the you.

Apr 17, 2021 · Holiday Jokes. Halloween Kid Jokes – Perfect for lunch boxes, print these for free! Christmas jokes – Another set of hilarious jokes to print. Elf Jokes – Printable cards are perfect if you have an elf on the shelf – they are funny even if you don’t) St Patrick’s Day Jokes. Easter Jokes. 7. When your drunk self decides to take a crack at it. ... but then gives up and delegates to sober you. 8. Or when your husband takes the list *too* literally. 9. When a 7-year-old makes a major ...

3 nurses walk into a patient's bedroom only to find him dead. The first nurse goes to check on him and notices that he had a massive erection so she tells the other nurses to give him a good send off by have sex with him. The first nurse does it and stops after getting tired. The second does the same and stops to share with the third nurse.1. What do kids play when their mom is using the phone? Bored games. 2. What do you call an ant who fights crime? A vigilANTe! 3. Why are snails slow? Because …

Guests Jokes. This joke may contain profanity. 🤔. I am over 18 Mar 13, 2024 ... 101 likes, 7 comments - dannybraff on March 13, 2024: "Exhaustive List Of Costco Jokes #comedy #standup #costco #jokes".Goodbye boiling water, you will be mist. All the fruits go on vacation in Pear-is. The dry-erase board is the most remarkable invention. I brought an egg to a comedy show and he cracked up. It ... They are, just as usual, a bit further down, and once yNov 21, 2023 ... ... list celebrity guests, memorable comedy, One-Liner Dick Jokes: My friend told me he has a tiny dick, and I said, “That’s no problem; size doesn’t matter… except when it comes to the ego!”. My dad always said, “Life is like a dick joke; sometimes, it’s hard to swallow!”. I was going to tell a dick joke, but it’s too long. I once dated an optometrist, and she said ...Nov 22, 2023 · View in gallery. Guilty pleasure dark jokes. 10. During a show, I once asked the crowd if they were pro-guns, and the majority belted out in approval. I asked a man in the front row why he was pro-guns, and he gave me the basic “personal protection liberty 2nd amendment” hooplah. 21. Eye jokes are the best. The cornea, the better. 22 Here are 100 funny lemon jokes and the best lemon puns to crack you up. These jokes about lemons are great lemon jokes for kids and adults. Here is our top list of lemon dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about lemons, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this lemon humor with others. Jump to: Lemon puns; Lemon one liners; Best lemon jokesJan 7, 2022 · All bottled up. “We used to play spin the bottle when I was a kid. A girl would spin the bottle, and if the bottle pointed to you when it stopped, the girl could either kiss you or give you a ... Are you in need of a good laugh? Look no further. We’ve compiled Dirty One Liner Jokes. Finally, here’s some hilarious one Best Corny Dad Jokes. "I'm afraid for the calendar. Its days Have you ever been in a situation where a simple joke had you doubled over in laughter? Laughter is a universal language that brings people together, and jokes are one of its most ...137 Jokes About Life. By Laughlore Team Updated on October 25, 2023. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, to a delightful exploration of life’s whimsicality. Life is a … 15. ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner, also known as a punchline in some case The four kids who make up the series’ wannabe gang are saving money to split for California. When one of them, Willie Jack (played, in a breakout performance, by Paulina Alexis), is asked by her ...Have you ever been in a situation where a simple joke had you doubled over in laughter? Laughter is a universal language that brings people together, and jokes are one of its most ... Here are 100 funny elephant jokes and the best elephant puns to[7. When your drunk self decides to take a crack at it. ... butJan 19, 2022 · A man and a giraffe walk into a bar. Aft 74 Funny Story Jokes That Earn Their Laughs. Linas Simonaitis and. Justė Kairytė - Barkauskienė. 27. 1. ADVERTISEMENT. A one-liner is well and fine if you need a quick joke to brighten up the mood. Yet, sometimes, the need arises for something longer, more along the lines of a funny story. But we all know how these situations tend to go—if ...31. Why did the credit card go to jail? It was guilty as charged. 30. What do you give prisoners for dessert? Jaily-Beans. #29 – 20. Prison Jokes. 29.